美国家长信奉的40条教子法则

1、改变孩子，要从改变父母开始。父母改变，孩子才能改变。

 

Changing a child need to start from changing parents. If parents change, the child can change.

 

2、父母最需要意识到的就是，无论自己所受的教育，还是自己的言行都存在诸多问题，首先要一点一滴挤掉自己身上的毒素，才能“更配”为人父母。

 

Parents need to realize that, regardless of his education, or his own words and deeds has many problems, the first thing is to crowd out her body toxin bit by bit，so as to be real parents.

 

3、在一个温和、充满善意的家庭中成长起来的孩子，性格不会出现大问题。孩子性格与品行出问题，责任基本出在父母身上。

 

A child who grows up in a gentle, well-intentioned family will not have big problems on characters. If children have problems on their characters and conducts, the responsibility is basically on their parents.

 

4、每一个父母都应该用一生的力量说出“我相信你，孩子！”

 

Every parent should use the power of a lifetime to say "I trust you, my child!"

 

5、任何教育的进步都是极其艰难和缓慢的，与其期待国家的教育变革，不如期待学校教育的改善；与其期待学校教育的改善，不如从家庭教育的改进做起。孩子的未来不是掌握在学校，而是掌握在父母手中。

 

The progress of any education is extremely difficult and slow. Instead of expecting the education change of the country, we should expect the improvement of education at school. Instead of looking forward to the improvement of education, we should start from the improvement of family education. The future of children is not at school, but in their parents' hands.

 

6、无论你到哪里谋生，无论你生活多艰辛，请一定带上你的孩子。孩子不在你身边，孩子就在更多的危险之中。

 

No matter where you make a living, no matter how hard your life is, bring your children. Children are at risk when they are not with you.

 

7、下班的路，是回家的路。花更多的时间和孩子在一起比什么都重要。人生的很多麻烦都是因为没有生活在自己家里造成的。

 

The way back is the way home. Spending more time with your children is more important than anything else. Troubles in life are usually caused by not living at your own home.

 

8、全家人一起吃晚餐，有助于小孩获得较好营养，较高学业成绩、较不会抽烟、喝酒、吸毒、打架、提早性行为。即使父母双方只有一人能赶上晚餐也会有上述效果。孩子的未来，往往在餐桌上和客厅里就已经决定了。

 

Family has dinner together, which helps children get better nutrition, higher academic performance, less smoking, drinking, druging, fighting and early sex. Even if only one parent could catch the dinner, it also works. Children's future, uaually has been decided in the dining room and the living room.

 

9、切勿在就餐时训斥孩子，餐桌是共享食物，交流思想与见闻的佳所。融融的亲情也有助于孩子学会感恩和餐桌礼仪。

 

Don't scold the child during the meal. The table is a good place to share food, exchange ideas and knowledge. Family affection also helps children to learn thanksgiving and table manners.

 

10、切勿在孩子临睡时进行教育，时常怀着恐惧、带着泪水入眠的孩子，生命会变得十分晦暗。

 

Do not to educate when your child is sleeping. when your child is always sleeping with fear and tears, his or her life will be very dull.

 

11、快乐的孩子，都有伙伴，孤独的孩子，性情容易变得古怪。鼓励孩子与同伴交往，鼓励孩子参加户外运动，是父母送给孩子最好的礼物。

 

Happy child has companions, lonely child is easy to be eccentric. Encouraging them to socialize with peers and participate in outdoor sports is the best gift that parents can give to their children.

 

12、你每天以什么样的方式对待孩子，慢慢的，你便会有一张什么样的脸，是孩子塑造了我们的面貌。

 

How you treat your child everyday, will shape your face slowly.

 

13、和孩子交谈，六岁之前适宜面对面，六岁之后要逐渐改为肩并肩。因为六岁之前的孩子在意你对他的关注，而青少年则不希望你“盯着他”，而是能够以朋友的方式和他交谈，这样他更容易打开心房。

 

Talk to your child face to face before age 6, and gradually change to shoulder to shoulder after age 6. Because a child before age 6 cares about your attention to him, and teenagers don't want you to "stare at him", he prefers to talk to you in a friend's way, so he can open his heart more easily.

 

14、父母发现自己误解了孩子或教育方式不当，应该诚恳地向孩子道歉。

 

Parents should sincerely apologize to their children when they find themselves misreading their children.

 

15、有教养的父母，不一定就能培养出有教养的孩子，但可以肯定的是，父母缺乏教养，孩子必倒霉。

 

A well-bred parent may not nurture a well-bred child, but it is certain that the child will suffer from a lack of parenting.

 

16、要正确对待孩子对老师的评价，不在孩子面前议论老师或与老师争吵。

 

Treat your child‘s evaluation of teachers correctly, do not discuss or argue with the teacher in front of the child.

 

17、不要当着孩子的面，与老师或其他家长议论孩子的优缺点。

 

Don't discuss your child's strengths and weaknesses with your teacher or other parents in front of your child.

 

18、孩子在学校遭受不公正、不人道的待遇，父母应主动与学校沟通、替孩子申诉，但同时也须意识到，如果这样沟通、申诉毫无效果，你就需要设法为孩子换一所学校。

 

When children suffer from injustice or

inhumane treatment at school, parents should take the initiative to communicate with school. But at the same time, it must be realized that if the communication have no effect, you need to try to change a school for your child.

 

19、即使孩子的学业成绩欠佳，父母也应全力鼓励孩子保持学习的热情，同时应该有勇气放低对孩子的期望值，因为最终决定孩子未来的并不是他的学习成绩，而是继续学习的信念。

 

Even if the child has poor academic performance, parents should also encourage them to keep learning, put lower expectations, because which ultimately determine the future of the child is not his grades, but belief to keep learning.

 

20、孩子成绩欠佳时，最重要的是父母不要变得沮丧、狂躁、失去信心，孩子即使输掉学业，他也不一定会输掉人生。如果父母丧失希望，孩子的人生一定也输掉了。

 

When a child gets poor grades, the most important thing  is that his parents don't get frustrated, manic, or lose confidence. Even if a child loses his school education, it doesn't means he lose his life. If the parents lose hope, the child's life will be lost.

 

21、把孩子交给祖父母抚养的麻烦在于，祖父母对孙子的喜爱往往超过了对自己儿子的喜爱，同时祖父母总是倾向于认为自己比孙子的父母更聪明更有经验，只有他们才能够使孩子有一个更好的未来。

 

Leaving your kids with grandparents have some troubles. They will love their grandchildren more than their own son, also they tend to think they have more experiences than their children, and they can make children have a better future.

 

22、三代同堂的家庭一旦为养育孩子出现分歧甚至争执，几乎没有调节与改善的可能，因为“真理往往掌握在脾气最坏的人手里”。

 

Families of three generations have little or no chance of improvement once they quarrelled about raising their children, because the truth is often in the hands of the worst tempered.

 

23、解决三代同堂家庭教育冲突的最好办法是分开居住，由父母独立养育自己的孩子。最糟糕的情形也莫过于你可能暂时伤了你父母的心，但你可以更好地尽到对孩子的责任。

 

The best way to settle the struggle for nurturing third-generation in the family is to live separately from the parents, and raise their own children by themselves. The worst case is that you may temporarily hurt your parents' heart, but you can perform your duty well.

 

24、为贪图生活的轻松、舒适而将孩子交给祖父母或保姆的家长，其实是拿孩子的未来做一场豪赌。

 

Parents who give their children to grandparents or nannies for the comfort of life are actually making a big bet with children's future.

 

25、在中国有60%的父母为孩子的未来极度忧虑，但其中不到1%的父母会为孩子的睡眠不足忧虑。很多儿童的未来其实是输在睡眠严重不足上。一个孩子只要睡得好，看世界看自己的方式都不一样。

 

In China, 60 percent of parents are extremely worried about their children's future, but less than 1 percent of parents are worried about their children's sleeping. Actually the future of children will lose because of lack of sleep. A child who sleeps well will see the world differently.

 

26、如果孩子情绪狂躁，先检查一下他的睡眠。如果家庭中冲突不断，先检查一下全家人的睡眠。

 

If your child is feeling restless, check his sleep. If your family is in conflict, check your family's sleep.

 

27、只要出自真诚，对孩子的表扬与鼓励越多越好。当孩子往前走，他回头时最渴望看得到的是鼓励的眼睛。

 

As long as it comes from sincerity, it's better to give more praise and encouragement to your child. When the child move forward, he will look back with the most eager eyes for encouragement.

 

28、艾瑞克·佛罗姆说：在性爱中，两个分开的人结合为一体。在母爱中，曾为一体的两个人被分开了。母亲不仅需要容忍，她还必须希望和支持孩子同她分离。母亲以爱和具体的帮助，使孩子顺利与自己分离。

 

"In sex, two separate people are integrated," says Eric Fromm. In mother's love, two people who once were one are separated. Mother not only needs to be tolerant, she must also hope and support her child to be separated from her. With love and concrete help, the mother separated the child from herself.

 

29、勤未必能补拙，扬长远胜于避短。

 

Diligence may not be able to fill in, far better than others.

 

30、负担过重，会导致肤浅，并必然导致后续学习时的“学业枯竭”，也就是说早期学习投入过度，后续学习必然失去成长的空间。

 

Overburden leads to superficiality, and inevitably leads to the "academic exhaustion" in the follow study, which means early learning investment is excessive,  follow study may lose the space of growth.

 

 

 

31、任何身体或心理的疾病，如果可以追溯到童年时期，往往都是最难治愈和最严重的。

 

Any physical or mental illness is often the hardest to cure, if it can be traced back to childhood.

 

32、在严酷的应试教育背景下，培养孩子适当的对分数的钝感力，有助于他更好的成长。

 

In the harsh test of education, it is helpful for children to grow up better by training them to be insensitive to grades.

 

33、在以分数为评价标尺的学校生活中，成绩落后、思维迟缓的孩子很难不受到伤害，培养孩子适当的对批评与伤害的钝感力，对他的成长更有助益。

 

If a child is falling behind, he will be hurt easily.So it is helpful for them to grow up better by training them to be insensitive to criticism and damage.

 

34、尊重孩子的兴趣，鼓励孩子自己去尝试，如果尝试失败了，继续鼓励孩子尝试别的，直到找到他喜欢的为止。

 

Respect their interests, encourage them to try. If the attempt fails, continue to encourage them to try something else until he finds what he love to do.

 

35、每一个人的成长都需要必要的条件，一个孩子的天份越高对成长所需要的条件也越为苛刻，所以，“莫扎特如果出生在一个农民家庭，很可能就会成为一种灾难。”

 

Every people all need necessary conditions for their growth. Talented children will need higher conditions, so "if Mozart was born in a peasant family, it is likely to become a disaster."

 

36、每一个人的成长都需要必要的条件，一个孩子若有智力或健康方面的重大局限，他对成长所需要的条件也就更为苛刻，为人父母就要倾其全力给予孩子关爱与帮助，孩子任何进步都具有石破天惊的意义。

 

Every people all need necessary conditions for their growth. A child who have intelligence or health limitations will need higher conditions.Parents should try their best to give help. Any progress of the child means a lot."

 

37、一个孩子若是性格内向、羞涩，就让他内向、羞涩好了，什么时候想改变是他自己的事情，你根本不应该勉强他。

 

If a child is introverted and shy, let him be introverted and shy. What time to change themselves is his own business, you should not force him.

 

38、教育孩子一定要有“各是各”的意识，就是要分清楚每件事情原因和责任之所在，既不能“数罪并罚”，更不能让孩子承担他不能承担的责任。

 

Educating child must have seperated consciousness, that is to say, separating the reason and responsibility of every thing. Do not combine punishment for several crimes, Do not let the child wo take responsibilities that  he can't bear.

 

39、当众责骂和惩罚孩子，几乎就是一种可怕的虐杀。

 

Scolding and punishing children in public is almost a terrible torture.

 

40、即使你认为非常有必要批评或惩罚孩子，也需要先克制一下，克制可以避免犯错，变得从容、理智，这都有助于你在教育孩子时候避免犯错。

 

Even if you think it's necessary to criticize or punish your child, you need to restraint yourself. Being calm and avoiding making mistakes will help you.